A Twilight Prequel
by idesXofXmarch
Summary: This is a prequel to Twilight. All of the characters belong to Stephenie Meyer, except the newest one. This is a story about Edward's serious love affair before Bella and how it has shaped him to be how he is.
1. Chapter 1

Forward

Everyone is familiar with the story of Edward and Bella. (This story takes place about forty years before Edward meets her). But, did you ever wonder what Edward's life was like before Bella came? Did Edward ever have another love? Did you ever ponder the reason behind Edward's protective nature of Bella? In this story, these questions will be answered and you will see what it was like before Bella entered Edward's life. I must warn you now; this story does not end on a very happy note. Remember, everyone who comes into your life has a purpose.

**Love is never lost. If not reciprocated, it will flow back and soften and purify the heart. – Washington Irving**

**'Tis better to have loved and lost than never to have loved at all. – Alfred Lord Tennyson**

Preface

I watched the horrific image that filled his mind after he released my hand. I sank down to my knees, my face crumpled in pain. "Please…" I begged him, but it was a wasted effort. He smiled an evil smirk down at me. "I'm a man who knows what he wants. Can you blame me?" his soothing voice laughed.

"Yes," I spat. With that, he turned and flew back toward the forest.

I needed to have her in my arms again.

Chapter 1: Visions

The one day that I actually wanted to go to school was a day that I could not. The math teacher had assigned a test today and I really didn't want to make it up. Alice had predicted sun today, and what a surprise, here we were, trapped at home. I envied my family as I watched them curl up together. What a wonderful couple Alice and Jasper made. They each complimented the other perfectly and brought out great sides of each other. Rosalie and Emmett each had a quality about themselves that the other worshipped. But the relationship that I envied the most was Carlisle and Esme's. There was so much compassion and pure love in their relationship. I suppose this did have something to do with Carlisle's ability to care deeply and Esme's to love passionately. Still, why didn't I have that? I selfishly thought of how I wanted what each of them had. Another half, another person who loved you just as much as you loved them.

As if Alice could read my mind, she then looked up. "_Edward, look."_ She showed me her vision of a pair of large, liquid gold, long lashed eyes. _"Do you know her? I'm feeling some sort of déjà vu. I think I know her, but it's as if I'm looking through a murky curtain."_

"What difference does it make?" I asked, irritated. I hated it when she bothered me with strange visions that had nothing to do with anything. "It's not like she's a threat or anything right?" By this time, the others perked up to try and figure out our somewhat silent conversation.

"_That's the thing – I have no idea, but I have this strange urge to try and find her_._"_

"What's going on?" interrupted Carlisle.

"Alice has an urge to go off and hunt down some vampire she doesn't even know," I explained, sarcastically.

"Alice?" Carlisle was now intently interested.

"I don't know Carlisle, I cant see clearly, its like trying to remember a…" she trailed off.

"A human memory"

"OH!" she gasped. She had remembered. "_Her name is Matia. We met while we were both human. She and I lived together in a crazy person house that we were sent to. She could sense spirits and would talk to what appeared to be nothing. We ended up being great friends; both of us were thought to be crazy. A day before witch burning was ruled illegal; she was burnt at the stake. I would have been next but they sent me to that asylum. Of course, I never knew she had been changed…"_

She then explained the girl's whole story to Carlisle. I couldn't see how Alice was just able to remember like that. Must be a _crazy person_ thing. Haha, her term made me chuckle.

"Are you bringing her here then?" Carlisle's question yanked Alice out of her exploration of the past.

"I think so…but I don't know what brought it on," she then looked at me, realization on her face. "Edward," she said, "a word?"

We ran off into the woods. I didn't want anyone else eavesdropping on this conversation. I especially didn't want Esme to know understand how envious I felt toward the family; toward her. She would be so upset that I had never said anything. This, of course, would be the direction that mine and Alice's conversation would take. Once I decided that I wanted what they all had, a love of my own, Alice had seen the vision of this Matia. This made us both curious. Why had _this _girl showed up once I thought that?

"_Okay, Edward. What's going on?"_ I guess there was no point to lie to her now. She would find out eventually.

"Well…" I began "I was thinking about how I don't have anyone. You have Jasper, then there's Em and Rose, and then Carlisle and Esme. But I have no one, Alice." I continued, "Then, all of a sudden, you have the vision of this girl and you have a pull to go and find her. What is that about?"

"_Edward…maybe you are supposed to be with this girl. Did you ever think of that?"_

"What? Are you implying that she is my soul mate? Alice, vampires don't even have souls…"

"NO! Don't you start with that "no soul" crap! Okay, what if she's not your soul mate, but maybe you would be good with her. She's very sweet, Edward. Please let me go find her so you can find out. You have been alone all your existence. Don't you think it's time to find someone? Oh wait of course you do… that's why I had the vision in the first place!"

"Alice," I started, "you will not force this. If it's meant to be, then let everything fall into place."

"Well you can't stop me from giving it a gentle little nudge." I closed my eyes and shook my head. Once you got Alice started, there was no way to stop her.


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter 2: Not Hoping

I convinced Alice to not go out looking for this Matia. If she even had this vision in the first place, that would mean that me and this girl could be a possibility. If the only way it could ever work would be Alice hunting her down – she would have never had that vision. How could it really be this easy for me? Besides, I knew myself better than to believe I would be susceptible to "love at first sight". But I did find myself thinking about this new stranger. Matia… meaning 'eyes' in Greek…how ironic. I also noticed in Alice's vision that her eyes were a liquid gold; she must enjoy the same lifestyle as my family. How did she know to change? How is she _not_ like the majority of vampires?

Apparently, I wasn't the only one who was thinking about this new stranger.

_Ah, I hope she will be the one for Edward… _Esme dreamt. We never spoke about it, but Esme and Carlisle were pained that I had not found anyone yet. How relieved they would be if things did work out with this girl.

Alice was torn in excitement. First, like my parents, Alice wanted to see me happy. Second, she was ecstatic to the possibility of seeing her human friend again. Jasper trusted in Alice's excitement. Emmett was thrilled at the idea of a new topic that he could make sarcastic comments and jokes about. Joy. Everyone was hoping that I would soon be happy – except for Rosalie. Rosalie was repulsed by the idea that I may find someone more attractive than herself. I had already known about this, but seeing it in her vain thoughts again irritated me. I tried not to think of this girl too much. What if I get my hopes up, and we never even meet her? Or worse yet, what if Alice's vision was horribly off and Matia turns out to be a bloodthirsty killer? _Her eyes…_ I retorted myself. No. I would not hope that things work out.

According to Alice, the cycle of sunny days would end tomorrow. So we would be back to school on Friday. Wonderful. As if I needed the _weekend_ now! The weekend would mean even more time to _hope _and_ think_. I shuddered as I thought the cursed word. _Wet…hot…pulsating…sweet…Mmm…mouth watering blood… _Jasper fantasized.

I've forgotten how long it had been since we hunted. Jasper's eyes were nearly onyx now. How could we be so irresponsible! And what with going back to school tomorrow! We could definitely NOT let Jasper into a room full of concentrated humans. Alice must be preoccupied with our potential guest... "Hey Jazz lets go hunting," I called.

We went north to hunt; the bears were just coming out of hibernation, and Emmett was craving grizzly. After I was finished with a large cougar, I sat up on a tree to watch my family hunt. _Hmm…this one looks feisty! Hopefully it will stand and fight instead of run! _Emmett was measuring his prey as he sank down to hunt the bear.

_Well I guess this is better than being a murderer. There is no comparison when it comes to taste though…_ Jasper amended. It was always hard for Jasper. At least tomorrow he would be well fed. The others were off somewhere else in the forest at this time. Alice sat perched on a tree like a bird ten feet away from me. _Wow I hope we find her soon. Edward can't catch a break can he? _I quickly turned my attention back to Emmett. He was nearly finished with the bear. He looked smug; I guess the bear was feisty after all. I hated it when Alice thought about me like that. It made me feel so pathetic. Did I really come off as being so miserable?

Just then, a northern icy breeze blew at us. Piney, glacial, – normal northern smells. But then, an extremely familiar smell came along with it. I felt the others freeze, as they smelled exactly what I smelled. Vampire.


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter 3: Surprise

In an instant, Esme, Carlisle, and Rosalie were back with the rest of us. Emmett and Jasper wore defensive expressions. Carlisle and Esme were wary, but open. Alice stood there, as a calm as if it were an old friend. An old friend… _"Matia," _she thought simply. I stood jaw rigid, and shocked that Alice seemed so sure. Rosalie wore no emotion on her face. Her thoughts were empty; she must be sure of Alice too. The northern breeze blew again. This time, the vampire smell was stronger. Mat – No I refused to hope it was _her_ – the vampire must be getting closer. We all tensed, except for Alice, as the last few moments separated us from the wandering vampire. I could tell that the footsteps became more cautious; they probably knew we were here.

Then, the unknown vampire stepped through the greenery.

She seemed like she was about six inches taller than Alice. So that meant she was about five feet and four inches. Even though she wasn't tall, she looked very fast. She had straight, sleek brown hair with a reddish tint to it. Her skin had probably once been a soft olive shade. She was slender, but also quite stable. Petite, but also able to put up a fight. She had a heart shaped face with definite, but soft looking lips and a ski slope nose. I caught my breath at her eyes. They were large, liquid gold, with dark long lashes, filled with wary curiosity. Matia. She was looking at me. Our eyes bored into each other. I was reading her mind, and it looked, from her expression, that she was almost…reading me? _Hmmm okay… none of them are showing any signs of aggression. That's good. The bronze haired male is very intuitive. Interesting. Their leader is welcoming. Why is the dark haired female looking at me like that? Is that recognition in her? Oh, my God, it can't be Alice!"_

How did this girl know so much from our expressions? Maybe observance is her talent.

"Matia!" Alice enthused, no question in her voice at all. I was about to warn her, but the response came before I could.

"Alice!" cried Matia, full of joyful recognition. The two girls embraced. It was funny how they were both thinking the same thing. Something along the lines of: _"I can't believe it's you! You are a vampire now! I missed you so much!" _This girl, I couldn't call her a woman more than I could call Alice a woman, seemed to have a very nice mind. She wasn't defensive or on guard. She seemed warm, loving, and kind. Her high observance must be her gift. I can't think of anything else it could be. Alice specified that she could sense spirits as a human… I was abruptly cut off as she stared at me. _Haha, he can't figure out what I do._ Again, how did she know I was studying her?

"Everyone," Alice called our attention. We were all watching her and Matia now.

"This, is Matia," she introduced. "I already told them about our past," she said to her.

"This is my husband, Jasper." Alice said fondly.

"Alice has told us much about you," Jasper smiled.

"It's a pleasure to meet you, Jasper.

_He has such a sweet spirit! Alice has done well. _"I'm glad my friend has found you." She added.

"This is Carlisle and Esme."

"Welcome, Matia," Esme smiled warmly at her.

"I'm sure it will be a pleasure getting to know you," Carlisle added.

_I have never seen more compassionate vampires._ Matia thought. "Thank you very much," she sang "I am very pleased that my friend has found such wonderful acquaintances."

"Emmett and Rosalie," Alice continued.

"Nice to meet you, Matia," Emmett greeted. _Yeah I can totally take her in a fight_ Emmett plotted. Without thinking, a low growl grew in my chest. Why did Emmett's plans anger me?

"Nice to meet you too, Emmett," had I imagined laughter in her voice?

Rosalie just nodded. Then her thoughts betrayed her. _Why does Alice see Edward falling for _her_? I just don't see why she is now better than me._

Matia nodded, but smiled widely and warmly. _Uh oh…_she thought.

There had to be more than just heightened observance on her part. From what I could see, Rosalie did an okay job hiding her true colors.

"And this is Edward," Alice said, purposely saving me for last. There were her eyes again, boring deeply into mine. _Why do I see such pain? What has he been through?_

"Hello, Matia," I said politely.

"Hello, Edward," she said with the same politeness. _Suffers in silence…too chivalrous to put anyone else through his pain…hmmm…_

I think I can eliminate good guesser. Not even Alice, with her imperfect visions could guess this much. Nor Jasper; with his ability to taste emotions. The things she was pondering were too deep for just a guess.

"Matia," Carlisle asked, "we have a house just a few miles south of here. Would you like to come back with us and visit for awhile?"

"Thank you, Carlisle, that sounds wonderful." She agreed. "I am eager to catch up with Alice get to know her family." She smiled widely and her eyes were bright.


	4. Chapter 4

**Chapter 4: Matia's Story**

Alice and Matia were chattering the whole way back to the house. Alice had been filling Matia in on our current lifestyle, how her and Jasper met, and how she had found Carlisle. All in a nutshell. Alice was hungry to learn what Matia had been up to. The girl said that it was a long story and that she would explain when they returned. Alice was definitely not going to let her go without the whole story. Poor girl.

When we got back inside, everyone gathered in the living room. Rosalie, being persuaded by Emmett to be polite would rather not be here. " _I wish Rose would just give her a chance." _ Emmett thought to me. I nodded. Carlisle spoke first.

"Matia, I'm simply astounded. How did you decide to prey on animals? I noticed from your eyes." He asked.

"I think you will need some background information before I get to the actual story, if you don't mind," she responded.

"Of course," replied Esme.

"What I was able to do as a human progressed into a certain talent that I have. It's very difficult to explain, but I have a knack for really understanding a person's spirit. For example, when I first met you, Carlisle, I was able to see that you are a very compassionate, nonviolent person without you saying anything to me. It's almost like I can see into a your soul and really know what kind of person you are. I'm not sure if that's the best I can explain it – I hope that's adequate enough."

I knew from her thoughts exactly what she was talking about. That's how she could guess about us so easily! She wasn't guessing at all – she was seeing our true souls without us hiding anything.

"Amazing," Carlisle breathed.

Matia laughed. I liked the sound.

"Ha, Edward!" Alice giggled. "Vampires _do_ have souls! We have a chance after all!"

"_Yes my son, I knew there was hope for you." _Carlisle was triumphant.

"We really have souls?" I asked her.

"Of course," she responded. "And an afterlife."

I scowled at the floor but I couldn't help feeling relieved. Not for myself having hope, but for Carlisle. Surely, if anyone deserved a chance at having a soul, at some kind of afterlife, it was Carlisle.

"Okay so how did you choose to hunt animals?" Jasper pressed.

"Oh that's right. When I was a newborn, I admit that I did hunt humans. After my third kill, I started to understand my talent better. See, when I hunted humans, I saw the goodness that most of them had in their souls. I saw that they had goodness and love and bravery. At first, I thought I was just crazy, but as it started to differ from human to human, I figured it out. I couldn't just kill them after I saw what they had in their true souls without the editing before they speak or the mask that is put on. It was very difficult, first understanding your prey, and then having to kill them. And when I terrified them, I saw the terror they were trying to hide and often couldn't." She stopped. "Again, I'm sorry I can't explain it better than that."

"Just like Edward and Jasper," whispered Alice.

"What?" Matia asked.

"I, also could feel what my prey felt," Jasper added. "It really changes things."

"I can read minds," I clarified. "I could hear the terror and horror of their thoughts. That's one reason why I don't hunt humans." I couldn't believe we had that in common. It was utterly mind boggling to think of another vampire giving up human blood solely because of the same reason I had. For Jasper, other factors were part of it, but for this girl, merely understanding her food was enough to disgust her. I thought that was just I – having to witness my prey's thoughts.

"You read minds?" she asked with wonder.

"Yes."

"Were you reading my mind? Before?"

"Yes. I thought you were merely very observant. Obviously, that isn't the case," I chuckled " Were you looking into my soul? Before?"

"Yes." She leaned toward me, ever so slightly. "You hide so much, Edward. Had I not had my gift, I would have never guessed…" she trailed off. I don't know what it was, but when she said my name, a warm feeling spread through my chest. What was this feeling? I only just realized, that I in turn, was leaning slightly toward her. She continued to stare at me, with fresh wonder in her eyes. I stared back. To see someone's soul…it amazed me to realize how much truth she had seen in mine.

_Haha looks like Edward will finally be on the other side of the whole mind reading thing!_ Emmett laughed. _Look at the way they are looking at each other. _ Both Rosalie and Esme shared this thought. Rosalie thought it with venom in her voice, while Esme thought it with adoration.

"Matia, you still haven't told us what you are doing here and what you have been doing," Alice reminded Matia impatiently. Alice's remark tore Matia's eyes from mine and focused them on the entire group.

"Well, I've moved around a lot. I definitely didn't stay in Biloxi. There were too many unpleasant memories there. For my first newborn years, I stayed in places that had abundant animal life, but were also in close proximity to civilization. I didn't want to come back to humans one day and be dying to quench my thirst. After the hideous newborn years were over, I had no idea what to do with myself. So I began to travel the world. Sadly, I had to refrain from some of the places I had wanted to go as a human. I couldn't go to Egypt, Australia, California – and many more places I wanted to go but couldn't because of the sun. I would find other peaceful nomads, but in the end, our hunting styles created too much controversy for ideal living. So I mainly just traveled the world, taking my time enjoying the place for what it was. I finally decided to go back to Biloxi – not expecting what I would find. I saw my parents, old, graying, and peaceful. I was glad that they were enjoying the remainder of their life. How much I wished I could run up to them, but I knew I probably end up giving them a heart attack. Imagine seeing your seventeen your old daughter, who has been dead for ten years suddenly run up to you. Definite heart attack. My sister was happily married with a child, as was my brother. I browsed through the records, finding out things about my family and friends. I saw that Alice was admitted to the asylum and died there. I was extremely sad that she had died that way. Or so I thought." Matia playfully narrowed her eyes at Alice. Alice then smiled back innocently, and angelically.

"Go on," Carlisle insisted.

"I kept wandering. I realized that I had been right in the beginning. Biloxi had nothing for me now. I didn't even know how to find the vampire that changed me. I stayed in South America for a while actually. I loved the Andes climate, but the natives there knew too much about vampires. As I headed out, I met an Amazonian coven. We lived peacefully together for a time. They didn't understand my diet and how I wanted to do something more than just wander through life. So they told me a story about a certain vampire coven in North America that survives on animal blood and plays a role in society as well." Her eyes scanned the room and smiled at us. "They told me this coven was especially unique and that they live on the Pacific Coast. Naturally, I was intrigued and yearned to meet this family for myself. I don't know how I missed you, but I ran too far north. I realized that I loved the cold and the fogginess of Canada. I stayed in the mostly uninhabited Northwest Territories for a while also. I got very distracted, and I forgot about the mysterious family." She scanned the room again, making sure she had not offended anyone. "So, one day, I decided to go hunting. I followed my prey down farther than I expected to. And then, I smelled seven vampires. Well, the rest is history." She finished. "I can't believe you wandered so much!" Alice exclaimed.

"I know, it was terrible," Matia agreed, "not knowing where you were off to next, wondering where to go." I couldn't believe how much I now respected Matia. She had been abandoned as a _newborn _and fought off the thirst by _herself_. She had been without any company for who knows how long, and she still seemed sane. She was still able to sit with a large group of vampires without any problem.

"Thank you so much for your hospitality," she started, "I really hope I haven't made a pest of myself."

"Not at all," Esme responded quickly. "Please stay as long as you like."

"Definitely," added Alice. "But I figured you already knew that."

Matia grinned at us. "Thank you very much," she said again.

"Matia, I don't think you understand that we are serious," Alice accused. "There is a spare bedroom upstairs if you want it."

"By all means," added Carlisle.

"Thank you very much, but let's see if you don't get sick of me after a few days before I'm moving in," she joked, but she was still serious. It was hurting me how much this girl thought that we didn't want her with us.

"We would all be more than happy if you do decide to stay with us," I smiled warmly, and her eyes brightened in response.


	5. Chapter 5

**Chapter 5:New Family**

It was settled. Matia was adopted into the Cullen family as we all had been once. She was literally jumping for joy that she had found a coven she connected with so much and that actually wanted to keep her. The public story was that her parents had recently died, and they gave their closest friend, Esme, prime custody of their daughter. We went early to school this morning to enroll Matia Cullen to Forks High School. She adopted the surname Cullen to make things easier now that Esme had custody. She would be a junior, just as Alice and I were. The receptionist had no problem putting Matia in classes with Alice and I.

_I can't believe I'm actually going to high school! Ok, so, blink, fidget, don't stare, and don't move too fast. I'm so glad I found Alice!_ Her bubbly thoughts this morning put me in a good mood too. Seeing her happy put me in brighter spirits. Just like yesterday, when seeing her doubt that we wanted her made me upset.

Either Alice or I was in her every class. She put up a better charade than we thought.

"How do you like high school?" I asked her as we sat down for biology.

"I love being able to do something with my life," she started, "instead of just mindlessly living."

"It's not that great, you learn all the arithmetic and you keep having to do it over again."

"Well I haven't even gotten to that part yet, but it seems like it wont be so bad." She began. "At least you're surrounded by your family and the people you love."

She hit my soft spot. I began to remember how she was by herself for years on end. I imagined myself in that situation, and shuddered. She noticed; not just by my shudder, but by the change in my soul's emotion._ "Oh Edward I'm sorry! I didn't mean for you to feel bad. I was just trying to brighten your mood about school. I feel terrible…" _Now she thought that she had hurt me.

"No its okay, it's nothing," I lied. She saw through that too. "I guess I just get spoiled with my family, I remembered how you never had one."

"I have one _now_," she clarified, and laid her hand over mine. She was surprisingly warm for a vampire. An electric shock jolted through my hand.

For the rest of biology, she listened intently while I observed her. If she noticed, she didn't say anything about it. I picked through the brains of the other humans that were in our class to see what they thought of her.

_Yeah that's Mrs. Cullen's almost niece. They aren't related by blood at all._

_What's up with that girl sitting next to that freak, Cullen? She's not his girlfriend is she?_

_You'd think Dr. Cullen and his wife would be happy with five kids. But no – what are they the Brady Bunch? _I decided to block these thoughts out and listen to _her_ thoughts. She wasn't paying attention to the teacher because she had learned this material from a biology class at Oxford. She was reading souls instead.

_Hmm this class has so many of the same emotions: curiosity, jealousy, nosiness…oops guess I shouldn't complain about that one…boredom…that's a common one… So, Edward, is lunch after this?_ She had caught me. How did she know? Oh well, at least she wasn't mad. I nodded. She turned in her chair to smile at me. Her smiling face; her eyes, were so pure. Like the sun was shining through an eternity of clouds. _"Thank you" _ I smiled back, it was so natural, like breathing, to smile and stare into Matia's eyes. And she didn't seem to mind. She had to tear her eyes from mine when the bell to leave the class rang. I hope she saw happiness in my soul now, for it had gotten brighter. Just like the new day being exposed to the sunrise after what felt like a lifetime of night.

The day went by slower after that. Not slow, but slower than it had the period before lunch. Matia was in my other classes, but the opportunity didn't present itself where we could just sit there and smile at each other again. Matia was very good with her thoughts around me. She hardly slipped anything. When she did slip, it was a realization of my slightly happier soul. That seemed to make her happy. Had she made the connection yet? I deeply wanted to talk to her about how her readings work. About what kind of afterlife there is for an immortal. It would have to wait. No matter how quietly we spoke, school was hardly a place for that.

When we got back, Carlisle and Esme had left a note that said they had gone for a walk. It encouraged Matia to go and find them so she could tell them about her day. She was excited to go and quickly ran off. Her thoughts seemed to be so simple and carefree. Alice was plotting. _In two minutes Matia would be ten miles away and wouldn't have a prayer of hearing what I'm going to say._ I fiercely hoped that Alice hadn't developed a loathing for her "long lost sister".

"_Alright then, Edward!" _she called, when two minutes was up. I couldn't have gotten to her side quicker. "What," I asked, nonchalant. She showed me a vision she had, around an hour before lunch. I had my arms wrapped around Matia, and Matia's arms were around me. My eyes were swimming in joy and I had the widest smile on my face. _  
"So?"_

"What?" I asked again, playing dumb.

"_Don't be stupid, Edward. We both know you love her_." Love her. Love her. Alice's last two words echoed in my head. Did I love Matia? Alice thinks I do. Alice also thinks I know I love her. Did I know what love was? I have seen it, but I have never experienced it in this form before. I had love for my brothers, and my sisters, and my parents. But I have never been _in love_ before. How could I love her already? Although…I knew already that her joy was my joy, that her pain was my pain. I think it worked the other way around too. I had a feeling that she became upset when I began to feel guilty this afternoon. I couldn't know for sure; she was so careful with her thoughts around me. Too bad you can't hide your soul. I knew that I loved it when she looked into my eyes and smiled at me. I knew that I never wanted her to leave. Was this love?


	6. Chapter 6

**Chapter 6: Feelings**

During the next few days, Alice was hounding me for an answer. "Edward you have to tell me! Please, please, please!" she begged.

"I don't know yet Alice," I muttered. "It's only been a week and you think I have the ability to posses loving feelings already."

"Edward think about this," she started, "if you really love her, she will know." This was true. Matia could also sense a change in a person's true self. No matter how major or minor. She would definitely see if I began to feel love. I would also be able to see if _she _began to feel love. Was this the reason why she was so cautious with her thoughts? No, I couldn't assume that.

"Yes, Alice, thank you. I never thought about that." I responded sarcastically.

"Well lucky for you, we are going shopping tonight," she said. "We still have so much to catch up on. And she needs the fashion advice." Alice smiled deviously. "So that means that you have time to figure yourself out."

"Alice, I don't need to figure myself out," I snapped. "If I grow to love her, it will come without me being forced to ponder my feelings."

"Fine," Alice said curtly. "Well then we will probably see you tomorrow morning."

I found myself feeling absurdly anxious for the early hours of the morning to dawn. The others definitely noticed.

_Oh! What if he loves her?_ Carlisle and Esme both thought joyfully.

"_Dude, give it a rest," _Emmett began. _"She's a big girl, she'll come back soon enough." Wow I have never seen him look that anxious. _Rosalie ignored me; her eyes were glued to the television. Good.

I would just have to find out; it was too early to tell yet.

When they walked through the door at two in the morning, a swell of relief filled me. I had to disguise my pleasure as Matia came back home to me.

"Welcome back," I said, before I thought it through.

"Thank you," "It's very nice to be back." She said, as she smiled my favorite sunshine smile. Again, we stood staring at each other for too long. She was searching my soul, again. _Beautiful_. She thought_._ Before I could wonder what she saw there to make her say…_beautiful_… Emmett cleared his throat loudly. He smirked at us; apparently, the situation was amusing to him. Her face was yet again, torn from mine as she greeted the rest of the family.

Esme and Carlisle politely excused themselves to go work on another one of Esme's architectural plans. I was surprised at the pure joy in their thoughts.

Rosalie left abruptly to go work on her car. Emmett came with her, no doubt. She needed someone to vent to. _"Damn, it's going to be a long night for me isn't it?"_

I chuckled quietly and nodded at him.

"Are you two going to be alright alone? Jazz and I need t o hunt." Alice asked.

"I'll be fine," Matia answered quickly.

"Edward?" Alice asked. Was she seriously asking me if I minded being alone with Matia? What a silly question.

"Alice, don't worry. We'll be fine," I consoled her. Alice's face was blank, but then she suddenly grinned.

"Okay good. We'll be back later. Bye!" she skipped happily out the door. Jasper following. I couldn't believe that we were actually alone together. Matia was in good spirits as well. What should I do? I didn't want to just sit here; she'd think I was boring.

"Do you want to go for a run," I asked.

"Sounds good," she replied.


	7. Chapter 7

**Chapter 7: Alice's Vision**

We ran together through the dense greenery. I was such an idiot – I was actually trying to _show off_. I prayed that she had no hint I was doing this, but I wouldn't put it past her. As much as I was showing off, she ran next to me the entire time. Even when I decided a nice burst of speed would be nice; there she was, running alongside me. We slowed down; I had some questions for her. She knew this too; from the inquisitive feeling of my soul.

We stopped at a spot where the trees thinned, but was still secluded. The morning fog and dew was dense on the greenery, creating a blanket around us. "So, what do you want to know?" she asked kindly.

"Vampires really have a soul?"

"Yes. Vampire souls are the most interesting to read. Humans are so changing that what they have in their souls is usually temporary, or not always as strong. But vampires never change their spirits significantly. For example, Carlisle will always be opposed to violence. Human souls reveal what they are like…now…. but there is not a good chance that they will feel like this in ten years. We, as a race, do not forget and hardly change. We have the gift of time; this lets us stop and think if this is who we really are. So when I read a vampire's spirit, I know that this vampire has been like that for many years." She paused. "There are two kinds of things I read when I look in someone's spirit. I can see what kind of a person they are. Generally kind, vain, protective… I can also see what they are feeling right now."

"That must be useful."

"Extremely. If a coven is aggressive or unwelcoming, I can leave before I have to actually find out." I didn't like the thought of Matia meeting an unfriendly coven.

"So I can read the thoughts…but you can read the feeling behind the thoughts…" I mused. Our talents were so related.

"Yes that's interesting… What have you read inside my mind?"

"I noticed how bubbly and carefree you are. It almost seems as if, when you are in a good mood, it puts me in a good mood." I blurted out. She smiled a kind smile on the outside, but on the inside she seemed to shine.

"What have you noticed about my soul?" I pressed.

"You have one of the most beautiful souls I have ever seen," she said quietly. "A lot of it had to do with the love you have for your family and your constant effort to be good. I have never seen another vampire with a soul like that." Her eyes saddened. "But then, I saw how much pain you had. I saw how you hid it from everyone and how you suffered on the inside. It made me want to help you somehow." I stared into her eyes. Seeing what she had seen, and knowing the reasons for the feelings she saw. "You have no idea how relieved and happy I became when the pain in your spirit began to fade."

"It was because of you," I told her quietly. "Your presence has brightened me in ways I have never experienced." She stared up at me with a mixture of many expressions in her eyes. Relief, wonder, happiness…love? I scanned her thoughts, no words, just feelings. Yes. Definitely love. I pecked her on her warm cheek. She was warmer than any other vampire I knew. "Thank you," I whispered. To my surprise, she stretched up on her toes to peck me on my cheek as well. Her soft lips were even warmer than her cheek.

"My pleasure." For a minute, we stared at each other. She read my spirit, taking her own joy from it, while I read her thoughts. We both stopped reading each other at that moment. We had found what we were looking for. The other's love.

Before I knew it, we were caught in a tight embrace; kissing passionately. It seemed as if we had made the choice at exactly the same time. Matia's arms were locked around my neck; and my arms were wrapped tightly around her waist. I realized that she was standing on her toes to try to reach my lips. I moved us over to a mossy rock so it would be easier for her. Her warm lips moved with mine, and her sweet icy breath caressed my face. My hands moved up to her hair as her fingers knotted in mine. Her hair was so smooth and soft. I could feel the tension between us growing; so I moved to her thoughts. _"Mmm… finally." _Had she been anticipating this moment as much as I had?

The early morning began to get lighter and lighter. They rest of them would be wondering where we went. Gradually, our lips became less urgent as we both pulled away. We did not move ourselves; we just stood there looking at each other. Slowly, Matia unwound her fingers from my hair and dropped her arms to wrap around my back. I pulled her closer and wound my arms around her waist. She leaned her head against my chest. I felt like the Edward from Alice's vision. Shining with joy.

"I love you," she murmured.

"Not as much as I love you," I whispered. She laughed and kissed me lightly once more on the lips.


	8. Chapter 8

**Chapter 8:Approval**

We ran all the way home, hand in hand. We entered the house to see the rest of the family in the living room. Everyone froze to observe us as we walked in. They took in our expressions, our eyes, and then focused on our hands twined together.

"Told you so," Alice sang to the room. Carlisle appraised us, standing in front of him. _"You have finally found happiness, my son. Take care of it."_

"I will," I promised as I lightly kissed Matia's cheek. Her thoughts went back to the forest…but then she stopped; _not now…_She could feel the yearning in me too.

Esme could not even speak. The amount of joy she felt that I had finally found someone was unbelievable. Her and Carlisle exchanged a long glance. Emmett and Jasper snickered, but on the inside, they both felt very happy for me. Of course, Alice was slightly smug that she had seen this and it had worked out. On the other hand, she too, was deeply happy for us. Thankfully, and surprisingly, Rosalie was happy for us. She got over her jealousy by getting to know Matia. It would be very hard to continue to hate Matia once you got to know her.


	9. Chapter 9

**Chapter 9: Personal Questions**

The tension came to an unmanageable point. It was literally killing me that we had not had alone time since the forest… There was still so much I wanted to know about Matia. I could read in her thoughts that she felt the same way about me. I needed to talk about things with her that could not be discussed in front of people like Emmett, who would snicker, or Alice, who always got the term "matchmaker" in her mind whenever there would be any sign of love. Even as understanding as Carlisle and Esme are, it would be distracting for both of us to hear/feel the joy they had for me. I had to know what lay behind those eyes… She did too good of a job controlling her thoughts.

"Matia," I tried one morning. She was reading one of Jasper's books about the Civil War.

"Yes?" She looked up at me with curious eyes; waiting. How should I ask her this? _Hey, Matia, do you want to go somewhere with me alone so that we can ask each other deep personal questions without my annoying siblings getting in the way?_ That's definitely what it boiled down to. While I stood there like an idiot, comprehension flitted across her face.

"_Let's go,"_ she thought to me. I knew that relief flooded my eyes. I didn't want to scare her by asking too much, or going too deep, but she understood my intentions and clearly had no problem with them.

I tried to lead the way into the forest, but she had other plans. At first, I thought she was simply trying to outrun me.

"_Haha, no Edward, I'm not trying to race you. Let me lead."_ She thought. She was taking _me _somewhere this time. After about three minutes, she slowed. As I pulled the last overgrown fern out of my way, I looked up to see where she had taken me. My breath caught in my lungs. We were standing on a ledge that scooted up against the wall of the mountain. Almost like a natural shelf. I couldn't call it a meadow because there was no clearing of the trees, but the space was large. The mountain mist hung like dragon's breath circling us. There was a tiny waterfall that ran down the mountain and into a shallow pool. From there, a natural brook carried the water off the ledge down to the rest of the mountain. It was ferny and very leafy; moss covered every rock and tree trunk. I looked through a clearing of trees to the very edge of the cliff. From this spot, the whole Olympic Mountain Range stretched out for us to see. I could only stare at Matia in amazement.

"How did you find this?" I asked her, breathlessly.

"By doing what I had been doing for over twenty years – wandering," she joked.

"This is beautiful."

"I know. I can't believe how lucky I was to find it."

We sat down on two moss-covered boulders that had fallen next to each other. I figured I would just get right to it. Not having to worry about light small talk. She knew what was brewing inside me, and I knew she was in that place too.

"Edward," she started. "I can only read your soul. I saw the change in you, but I don't know what's behind it. I can't read your mind, you will have to tell me." I stared intently into her eyes as I answered; trying to communicate the rest of the story that I could not express in words.

"For about forty years now, I have been surrounded by close, intimate relationships. It hurt me to look down at my empty hands, as Alice and Jasper would twine their fingers together. Everyone in my family was matched up, except me. Everyone had a love their could pull close, except I. They all had the one thing they couldn't live without. I didn't." Matia had a pained expression on her face. It hurt her to feel my pain. She was half extended, with her arms outstretched, as if to get up and comfort me. Unable to keep looking at her, I got on to the happy part of the story.

"And then," I began again, "we met. I don't know how to explain it, but seeing the happiness in your eyes, brightened me. And then I began to hope." I paused, letting her absorb the feeling.

"Hope for what?" she asked.

"Hope that there was something more. That you weren't just a genuinely happy person, that was pleasant to be around."

"What do you think now?"

"I think I was right to hope. Please correct me if I'm wrong, but I feel that there is something more here."

"I definitely agree. I have never had a stronger pull toward anyone before. I have never felt like this about anyone in my life. No, – not life. Existence. But I am still confused, how did only my being here affect you so much?"

"I haven't exactly explained everything." I laughed. "When I realized how I felt about you, my hope that there was something more sparked, which brightened me, as you said." I continued. "After being alone for nearly four decades, of course I would be brightened if I thought I had a chance at love." I peeked up from under my lashes at her. She was looking at me as if to catch my bluff. She didn't believe me. I gathered up all my feelings in one place, even brought out the ones I had tried to hide for her to see. She absorbed this and then looked down.

"My turn," she said. "Not only did your happiness affect me as well," she started, "but when I saw how your soul changed so abruptly, when I began to sense how you felt about me, I think I literally shone. That was the key. That is what told me I was in love with you; my reaction to discovering your feelings about me. However, I was still in disbelief that I could have found someone so easily. I tried to conceal these thoughts from you."

"How is it possible that someone as lovable as you," I began, "has never found love before? I asked, full of wonder. She shrugged.

"How is it possible that someone with as beautiful a soul as yours," she said, her voice full of emotion, "has never found anyone to love?" Matia asked, her voice was, too, full of wonder.

"Because someone like me has never found someone like you," I answered simply.

The pure sunshine in her eyes and smile could have shone through all the clouds that hovered over the Olympic Peninsula.


	10. Chapter 10

**Chapter 10: Sacrifice**

On the one hand, I wanted to continue talking to Matia about the exact reasons that we loved each other. On the other hand, I knew that when I held her in my arms, that our love was unconditional, and unexplainable. Of course, there are many factors that led up to this, such as Matia's revelation of my soul, and how I seemed to become happier when she was happy. But our actual, pure love couldn't be explained with reasons.

One day, as we were all gathered on the couch, Alice's face went blank. Everyone turned to watch her. Horror started to leak across her face. I felt Matia freeze in my lap. I watched Alice's vision as she saw it. _Fifteen ghosting figures in pitch-black cloaks gathered around the Cullen house. Aro, extending an offer to Edward; wanting him to join his guard. Aro trying to be persuasive. Not turning away after _one _no from Edward. In time, Aro would eventually find some reason to threaten the Cullens. In exchange of leaving them in peace, Edward would have to join him. Aro seeing the new additions: Jasper, Matia, and Alice. Four new vampires with remarkable gifts who he wanted to join him. _The vision ended. Alice looked at me, at Matia, then at Jasper with a worried expression. "What do we do?" Alice whispered, fresh terror in her eyes. Before I could say anything, Emmett, Carlisle, Jasper, Esme, and Rosalie all yelled for us to explain. I looked down at Matia; she had felt the terror in Alice and I. She didn't need us to explain for her to grasp just how terrible Alice's vision was.

"There is no chance that Aro will be coming in peace?" Carlisle asked hopefully.

"He will come peacefully, but he won't give up quickly," Alice explained.

"Well what's wrong with just waiting them out?" Jasper asked, confused. Alice just looked at him; she couldn't get the words out of her mouth.

"The fact that Aro will become even more ecstatic when he finds out what you, Alice, and Matia can do," I clarified. "Once he realizes what the four of us could do for his guard, he will try even harder to get us."

"We won't let him," Emmett growled fiercely. No doubt, hoping for a fight.

"It doesn't end there," Alice whispered, "he will be looking for excuses to come again, monitoring our every move, waiting for us to do something that will make him not in peace, but as the punishing Volturi. He will agree to leave us in peace, if Edward joins him."

"We'll leave then," Esme suggested, hope in her eyes. "That way, when they come here, there won't be anyone to find."

"Demetri will track us," Jasper scowled. "Even if the four of us leave, he knows Edward."

I knew what had to happen. Alice, Jasper, and Matia had to leave while the Volturi persuaded me. We couldn't let Aro know what else he would want to gain. There was no way that Aro could know about Jasper, Alice, or...Matia. A new kind of despair washed over me as I thought of the gift cradled against my chest leaving me. As she felt this new emotion, she shuddered, and then I saw her realize what had to happen dawn in her mind.

"_No. I won't leave you." _She thought as she looked up at me with fierce determination in her eyes.

"You have to. I can't let Aro know about you." The possibilities ran through her head.

"_If I stayed we could be together, but Aro would have more a reason to threaten our family. That's not an option. If the four of us left…the stupid tracker would find us eventually, forcing themselves on us. We couldn't run. Edward and I going one way, while Alice and Jasper went another way. The Volturi confronting Edward is absolutely unavoidable. This way, we are the only ones they would find. Alice, Jasper, Esme, Carlisle, Rosalie, Emmett; they would never be in danger." _She looked up at me, her expression minutely optimistic.

"No. There is no way that I am going to let them find you, too."

"I'm not leaving you. And I'll just follow you if you attempt to leave."

I shook my head sadly. "The only way is for you, Alice, and Jasper to leave. They will also be tracking Carlisle's scent and mine. They will grow suspicious if we are not in the same place." I choked out. "They will know we were hiding something."

Matia understood that this _was _the only way that our family would not be endangered any more than they already were.

"_I can't go off and hide with Alice while you are left to face those greedy, evil monsters."_

I would gladly give up my talent if it meant that I would never have to see her suffer like this again. I looked around the room at the rest of my family, who would soon face a mob. Emmett was excited; he gladly hoped this would turn into a fight. Matia felt the bloodthirsty edge to him. We both hissed at him. "Oh yeah, sorry," he amended with fake sincerity.

"I don't like the thought of us splitting up at a time like this," Carlisle said sadly. "But, if it is the only way, I guess that's what has to happen."

"It is," Alice and I answered together.

"So be it."

"How long," Rosalie warily asked.

"Three days," Alice admitted, full of sorrow.

At this, Matia huddled even closer to me and buried her face in my chest. I wrapped my arms around her, realizing why no one else was reacting like we were. No one else had to be separated from _their_ love as this danger encroached on us.


	11. Chapter 11

**Chapter 11: Complication**

We talked strategically about what to do about our 'visitors'. Jasper thought that he, Alice, and Matia should leave as soon as possible. The Volturi were probably on their way, already, and he didn't want there to be any chance that they would catch their scent and follow them out. This made the most sense, but Matia still hated having to leave me. I tried to conceal just how much I would be hurting as well, since this would make her even more distressed. Of course, she saw through my charade. It was decided that Matia, Alice, and Jasper would leave this following morning. Alice predicted snow, which would mask their scents.

Just then, a startling thought occurred to Carlisle. _"It doesn't matter. Aro will shake my hand and find out everything."_ He stared down at his hands.

"No!" I roared. I made everyone in the room except Carlisle and Matia jumped. She had seen it in me before I erupted. They looked at me with startled expressions. I explained with venom coating every word.

"He'll find out about them. It won't make any difference if they are here or not," Carlisle murmured.

"Let's think about this," Esme began, "Aro doesn't suspect anything. There would be no reason for him to want any information from us. The only way he would insist on touching us would be pure curiosity."

"We should stay," Matia hopefully offered.

"Not a chance," I forcefully retorted.

"If Aro found out about us and decided to try and find us," Alice started, " I would know right away and we would come back here and figure something out. Unless it was a snap decision"

"There's no reason for you to be that close to him when he might not even use his gift," I said calmly to Matia.

"Okay then, what if he does use his little gift. What do we do now?" she snapped.

"We stand up and firmly tell him we will not join him." I soothingly responded.

"Which won't stop him. Aro would go to extremes to gain members of his guard." Alice said sadly.

"If Aro doesn't find out about Alice, Jasper and you, he wouldn't have any reason to threaten us." There was nothing else we could do. If they stayed, he would know. If they left, but he used his gift, he would know. If by some miracle he did not use his gift, he wouldn't know. Might as well shoot for the miracle.

Alice, Matia, and Jasper would leave in the morning. They didn't know where they would be going. If they had a location in mind, Aro would touch my hand and know. He could very well send a tracker to go get them. If Aro did decide to use his power, Alice would have a vision and come straight back. It would be ideal that we were all together if this happened just in case Aro sent someone after them.

That night, we sat on the black leather couch in my room, absorbing our last hours together. I looked into her eyes and saw worry; but not for herself, for me.

"Everything will be fine," I promised.

She continued to stare at me; obviously my words didn't help.

Without saying a word, she leaned forward and began tracing my face with her fingers. A physical remembrance in her brain of what my face, my skin was like. Her warm fingers ran along my forehead, down my nose and across my cheekbones to trace the outline of my lips. I closed my eyes in contentment and let her hand trace the hollow of my eye and eyelids. I let out a slow exhale. "You have no idea how this feels." I opened my eyes to see her smiling. It wasn't her joyous smile, but it wasn't fake. Without warning, I closed the distance between us until my lips found hers. Her hand, which had still been tracing my jaw, fell down my neck and down my arm until her hand found mine. Our kiss was still so sweet and gentle, but hidden on the inside was sadness. Even though we would only be apart for a couple days, not knowing what was happening to the other while danger was near was painful. It was amazing how we both had the urge to not waste a minute. To be with the other as much as possible. Too soon, she reluctantly pulled away slightly. "Please don't," I pled.

"There's one more thing I need to get me through the next two days," she explained.

Slowly, she sank down from her kneeling position to sit beside me. She laid her head against my chest and wound her arms around me. I pulled her onto my lap and cradled her against me, and kissed the top of her head. "I need to remember _this_," Matia murmured.

So did I. I knew that during the next two days, the only thing that would be able to comfort me was this feeling.

We sat there on my couch, holding each other, until the sun began to rise.


	12. Chapter 12

**Chapter 12: Annoyance**

As the sky started to get brighter and brighter, I felt the anxiety creeping up on us. Matia moaned quietly. I wrapped my arms more securely around her in response. Emmett's booming voice echoed in the hallway outside the door.

"Edward, have you seen Matia?" he asked, coming closer to the door. "Jasper said that they have to – " he opened the door. "- Go soon." He stopped in the doorway; a smirk began to fill his face as he took us in. "So that's where you have been all night," he said to Matia, a full on mocking grin on his face now. "We were looking for you last night. We checked your room but you weren't there and we were about to check here but Alice said that you weren't there and to leave Edward alone. We figured you went hunting or something." He shook with laughter. I growled, and Matia smoothed the line that was deepening across my brow.

"Shut up, Emmett," she said simply.

"Ok fine. I'll leave you two alone," he winked at me. I bared my teeth in response.

"_Dude, chill out." _He laughed. "But you really should come down in a few minutes. Jasper wants to leave soon."

"Thank you," Matia answered quietly, sadly. As Emmett left, he called downstairs. "Hey Jazz, you'll never guess what I just walked in on!" There was muffled talking, and then a chorus of obnoxiously loud laughter and whistling.

"I am going to go rip their heads off," I snarled.

"Shhhh…. Please relax…" her sweet breath washed around my face again, instantly calming me. I closed my eyes as she continued soothing me. I tried not to think about Emmett's own crude, explicit story of what he saw; which he was telling downstairs.

She could feel the tension in me and sighed.

"I'm irritated too. Don't worry; we'll get him back once all this is over. Right now, I don't want to spend my time being annoyed by Emmett when I could spend it with you."

"You're right. I'm sorry." I apologized.

My ferocity toward Emmett disappeared as we walked downstairs. With each step, we got even closer to being separated. I answered all the unspoken thoughts as we entered the room with a simple, "Emmett has quite the imagination."

"When do we leave?" Jasper asked Alice.

"Now. If we don't go now, we won't reach the snow in time."

As Matia said her goodbyes first to Carlisle, Esme and Rosalie, I took Jasper aside.

"If you make any jokes that offend her," I began in a deadly tone, "I will personally break your arm."

"Relax," and I literally did. It was so annoying when he did that. "I knew Emmett was kidding the whole time; you're not _that_ good." I growled. "Kidding! Ok I won't say anything." He added.

The second Esme released Matia; I crushed her to my chest and kissed her urgently.

"Please take care of yourself. I wouldn't survive if you got hurt," she begged.

"Only if you promise to keep yourself safe. Because I couldn't live if you got hurt."

"Never say that," she suddenly snapped. She saw the question in my eyes.

"If anything ever happened to me," I groaned, but she ignored me. "you would move on. You would continue with your life." It wasn't a question. It was a demand.

"Nothing will happen to you," I assured her.

"Either way."

I held her in my arms one last time before I watched as she followed Jasper and Alice into forest. She stopped at the fringe of the trees and looked back at me, one arm raised straight out toward me. Her eyes blazed into mine. _"I love you." _Then I watched as my love ran away from the rising sun, into the darkness.


	13. Chapter 13

**Chapter 13: Visitors**

Just as Alice predicted, a snowstorm hit Forks about two hours after they left; covering their scents. As much as we hated waiting inside for our "visitors" to come, we couldn't go outside and wait. Aro would certainly suspect something. We decided that once we got the first whiff of vampire, we would go outside in the clearing to meet them.

I sat down next to Carlisle as we waited. _"Edward, you know I don't believe in Emmett's crude version, and I know how much you love Matia, but I must warn you that physical love should not be taken lightly. Imagine how much more terrible the aftershock would be if something happened to her?"_

"Carlisle, first of all, nothing happened last night. Second of all, nothing is going to harm her." I said the second part strongly, full of emotion.

"Oh I'm sorry," he laughed, "but please still remember my warning." I was about to say more, but Rosalie suddenly froze.

"Vampire," she breathed. They were coming. Alice was not back yet – Aro must not be planning on using his gift. A swell of relief washed through me as I processed this. Aro would never know about Matia. She would be safe from his desire.

Just like in Alice's vision, we went to stand outside as a line of pitch black descended on us. When we were about twenty feet apart, Aro stepped forward, arms high in the air.

"My dear Cullens," he greeted.

"Welcome, Aro," Carlisle politely greeted back.

"Ah, I see your coven has grown. I know you, Esme, and Edward, but who are these two?" he gestured toward Emmett and Rosalie.

"This is Rosalie, and this is Emmett," Carlisle introduced.

"It is a pleasure to meet the both of you," Aro kindly smiled. "I see that Edward is still alone," he sadly expressed to me.

"Yes," I reluctantly choked out. Aro held my gaze for a minute; pity on his face.

"Now, Edward, we have a large variety of females you may grow to like that are a part of my guard. Why don't you join us?" Aro said this as if it just dawned on him. He smiled hopefully, waiting for my response.

"_Be nice." _ Esme reminded me.

"A very tempting offer, but I was already away from my coven once; I would have just ended up coming back." I put a fake apologetic smile on my face.

_Such a waste…_Aro thought. "I'm very sorry that you feel like that." He said. Sadness touched his eyes.

"I am sorry things didn't work out," I consoled.

"Well don't make your decision yet. Think about it for a bit. In the meantime, I will take my guard to go hunting."

"Aro, if you don't mind," Carlisle started, stepping forward, "we would appreciate it if you didn't hunt in this certain area. We have to remain conspicuous."

"Oh of course, my dear friend," Aro amended. "We were planning on going much more east."

"Thank you," Carlisle smiled warmly. After that, they were off. Fifteen black ghosting cloaks flew off into the exact opposite direction that Alice, Matia, and Jasper had previously exited to.

"How long does it take them to hunt?" Emmett asked eagerly.

"About one hour," Carlisle guessed.

"What will they do?" Rosalie asked me, her hands balled up into fists.

"They will tell us the advantages of joining them. They see that Emmett is a fighter, so they decided that there is a better chance of me joining them if more of us will too." I explained.

"They want me to join them too? Ha!" he laughed.

"We must remember that the Volturi do not have a reason for us to be tense. If we want to avoid contact with Aro, we will have to be welcoming, but not to the point of a handshake. Also, they cannot get too close to the house or else they will smell the different scents." Carlisle warned. My jaw automatically tightened at this, and my hands became fists. The thought of Aro or any of them realizing what we were hiding was the worst situation.

"Edward, if you want them to remain hidden, you can't do any of _that_," Rosalie hissed.

As they filed toward us again, I could see the deep ruby color of they eyes under their cloaks. Maybe _feeding_, as Aro put it, would put him in a better mood.

"Ah, I do not see why you try so hard to go against your nature," Aro mused.

"Yes, we know how opposed you are to our lifestyle," Carlisle responded friendlily.

Aro gave up on this issue. "Now on a less controversial issue," Aro began. "After talking with my brothers, we have decided to extend an offer for all of you to join us." Aro smiled as if he was offering us a generous gift. Carlisle responded.

"As wonderful as that sounds, I think we are going to stay here. Thank you so much for offering, Aro, really, but we like living among humans," Carlisle apologetically smiled.

"I understand your position, Carlisle," Aro nodded.

"Edward?"

I shook my head.

"Emmett?"

"A tempting offer," he smiled, "but I stay with my family."

"Very well," Aro sighed. He turned to his guard. "It seems, my dear ones, that we have no business here." He turned back to us. "It's a shame it didn't work out," he looked directly at me, "but I have to respect a no." Aro turned toward Carlisle. "It was wonderful seeing you again, old friend. Thank you for your hospitality."

"Our pleasure. It was wonderful seeing you again, as well." Interesting choice of words.

"Well then," he turned back toward his guard again, "we have no business here, let us be off." In a _snap decision_, he decided to walk toward me. I froze. I read the image in his mind. Horror flew across my face. I took an involuntary step back. "Why so tense, Edward?" he asked in a soothing voice. He stretched his hand out. "It was very nice seeing you again." What was I supposed to do? If I didn't shake his hand, he would know something was wrong and would get us to tell him by force. Sorrow touched my eyes. It was unavoidable. I thought of Esme, Carlisle, Rosalie, and Emmett, who was only too eager to fight. It was the only thing I could do to keep it turning into aggression. I stretched my hand out to meet his. I watched as a million images flashed through his head.

_The first realization that Matia and I loved each other. Our first kiss, every time I held her in my arms. Everything she could see in our souls. What she saw in mine. Alice's every vision. Jasper's manipulation of our emotions. Every thought I had heard. Matia, Alice, and Jasper running away. _Aro knew all of this. He removed his hand and an evil smile spread across his face, along with an evil plan in his mind. I forced this out of my head – knowing that if I didn't I would have an exceptionally hard time biting his head off. I sank down to my knees, my face crumpled in pain.

"Please…" I begged him, but it was a wasted attempt. This man was far too evil to be changed from his plan.

"Please don't hesitate to come visit us as well," he smiled. "Peace my friends." Peace. Of course that's what he was thinking.

The pitch-black cloaks suddenly turned and took flight back into the east. I stared after them, not moving, until I couldn't see, hear, or smell them. I gasped as my first ever tear in my existence as a vampire streamed down my cheek. I needed to have Matia in my arms again.


	14. Chapter 14

**Chapter 14: Threats**

I smelled her sweet scent back in the house. Alice had had the vision, and they came back. Aro wouldn't have done anything _no_w he was much too evil. He would have preferred that I saw the plan in his head, that I had time to dwell on the fact that he was coming again.

"That man was much more of a devil than I thought," Matia said from the top of the stairs as I walked in. I knew she didn't know his plan, but she could see that his soul was as black as his robes. She took in my expression, which I could only assume was hopelessness, and put that together with the darkness of my spirit. Her face fell. _"How bad was it?"_ She had no idea that what I saw in his head was any more terrible than what she assumed. I couldn't find my voice. I ran up the stairs and took her face in my hands. I saw the startled look on the surface of her eyes, but behind that was the warmth, the love, and the goodness of her. The pain slipped from behind my already lousy poker face and betrayed me as I thought of losing her. I pulled her to me and held her there tightly, with my face buried in her shoulder. She held me and buried her face in my chest. She didn't have to know about what Aro's plan was to feel as horrified as I did. Just as before, my pain was her pain and her pain was my pain.

"Edward," Carlisle tried, ache filled his voice, "we need you to tell us what Aro was thinking." I swept Matia off the floor and into my arms and took us to the family room. There was not a force on this Earth that could make me let go of her now. I sat us down, still not letting go, in the midst of our terrified family.

"I'm so sorry," I started. "Aro would suspect something if I refused to shake his hand." My family nodded their heads with despair. "Of course, Aro saw what we were hiding, and he also got a better look at my talent. When he let go of my hand, a wicked plan dawned on him. This was the blackest thing the Volturi have ever thought about doing. An image filled his mind of myself on his right hand; a useful implement that could reveal a person's true thoughts. He thought of what advancement I could make to his guard. He thought of using me to…" I spat this last part, "rule the world." A disgusted expression filled Carlisle's face. Esme was confused.

"I don't understand. He already had this mental picture, how did his outlook into your memories make this picture more likely to come true?" The part was coming where my true pain would be revealed.

"It made things clearer for him when he thought of a method called persuasion. He knows I would join if he threatened to destroy the one person I love the most." A gasp ran through the room. "Matia." I finished.

"Can't we fight them off?" Emmett asked wearily.

"They have over two hundred members of their guard," sighed Carlisle, "and if we tried, they would end up killing us all and taking the ones he wants."

We sat in silence.

"Is there no other way?" Alice choked.

"Not that I can see," I admitted. My voice was dead now. There was no emotion present.

"Which leaves us to the decide…" Esme croaked.

"There is nothing to decide," Matia's fiery voice rang out. "The decision has already been made." I stared at her in horror.

"No." I answered her unspoken thought, filled with horror that she even thought that.

She looked straight at me, ignoring my last remark.

"Losing _me _is no reason for you to change who you are. You are not corrupt like Aro is," she snarled the name. "And I will not live on as you unwillingly assist him to be the tyrant of the world."

"I can't lose you," I cried. She stroked my face, soothing me, but it was taking all her energy to not break as I was.

"Life has already blessed us with being together. We can't lose our gratitude when it is time for us to be apart. You put meaning into my life. Think about that blessing! Think of all the people who never find that! Life has blessed us with so much already! It's not reasonable for us to grieve when this part of our lives must come to a close." She smiled, but I could see the effort that was put into placing it there.

"But you taught me how to love. How can I give up the person who had that much of a significance?" I whispered.

"Because every person that comes into your life has a purpose. Yours was to transform my life from dull, and gray, to being meaningful and passionate! You say I taught you how to love, if that is true, then in the future, you will take that and give it to the luckiest woman in the world."

"There won't ever be anyone who I would rather give my love to than you."

"I promise you someone will come that will touch your heart."

"But not his soul," Alice stated.

"No, my soul has already been touched." I looked deep into Matia's eyes. I remembered the first time I saw them. Bright curiosity filled them then. Now, there was strain, but there was also a deep love for me. How could I possibly give this up?

"We can't doom our family, our friends, our posterity, to Aro's dictatorship."

I looked around the room for help, but it seemed that everyone was painfully agreeing with Matia's resolution.

"I am not strong enough to let that happen."

"You'll have to be. Edward, I hate the thought of being torn from you, but can we really let Aro's dream come true?"

I didn't answer. I knew the answer was 'no', but I couldn't bear the consequence that came with it.

I excused us to go upstairs. Even though Matia meant every word, water streamed down her face; the consequence of losing each other didn't affect her any better than it affected me.

We had already been given each other; and us being together for so long was already pushing our luck. It wasn't fair that that two people should be treated so much better by the universe than anyone else. How could we be such fools to believe that the Fates would let us keep each other?


	15. Chapter 15

**Chapter 15: Bliss**

We argued over the next few days about the decision I would have to make. I persuaded her to try and see things my way. The way where we could be together. She felt hopeful at this, but every time, her head would fill with a vision of me, with dark red eyes on Aro's right hand; using my talent to take control of the world.

"Edward, I love you more than life. If I loved you, I couldn't let you throw away your life, your beliefs, your principles like this. Even if we stayed together, Aro would fill our heads with greed and power – we wouldn't ever be the same again. There would be no room in us left to love," she choked. I was speechless. I knew she was right, and it pained me to agree with her. Aro would twist me so much to be like him, that there would be no room in my heart to love. I would unconsciously turn bloodthirsty, corrupt, and greedy for power. Who could possibly love that? Matia. She would love me no matter how evil I turned. But I wouldn't be able to love her. And not being able to love Matia while she loved me was terrifying to think about. I couldn't put her through that.

I sighed, defeated.

"You would follow me to Italy. You would join the guard. You would still love me, but I can't put you through the experience of me not being able to love you."

"We know our decision then," she whispered.

I just nodded and pulled her face to mine. There was an unsettling edge to this kiss. As her lips moved with mine, and as her warm hands held either side of my neck, we could both detect urgency. I suddenly felt warm water touch both our cheeks; it didn't matter if it was from her or from I, when one of us felt pain, it affected us both. As if we only had so much time left – which was absolutely true.

She pulled away, too soon, sensing my fresh despair.

"We can't think of it. I want to enjoy every minute we have together until then. We can't waste it by dwelling on the time when it will happen." I closed my eyes.

"You're right," I breathed.

"It won't be easy, but we have to try," she murmured. She leaned in and we picked up where we left off.

We would spend our remaining time together in bliss – letting ourselves believe that we had eternity together.

One night, while I was playing one of Esme's favorites on the piano, a new melody came to me. It started out ordinary, quiet. Then, there was a burst of melody that was still soft, but powerful and full of meaning. It sank down to a heavenly harmony. My hands moved down the keys, the melody taking a sad, soft, slow rhythm. Then it stopped. The end frightened me.

"That's beautiful, Edward," Matia adored, next to me one the bench.

"Of course it is. It tells the story of you coming into my life." She smiled and sighed, leaning her head against my shoulder.

"Thank you."

I continued working on this piece. When it came to the harmony, instead of me playing both pieces, we each played one; which complimented the other perfectly, not one note out of balance. As the song finally came to an end, I looked up to see tears welling up in her eyes. I reached out to hold her hand.

"It's ok, you will have an afterlife," I guaranteed her. "There is no way that someone like you could be damned to hell." Even though I was the one that spoke, I shuddered. Thinking of her leaving me forever was torture.

"I'm not afraid of that," she looked at me bravely, "I'm only afraid of losing you."

We both knew that if we had this conversation again, we would try to convince ourselves of the other solution. But I knew this was the only way. I was left with the choice of her leaving a world where I loved her, or her living in a world where I couldn't love her. It would be much less painful for her if we went with the first option, since Matia and Alice both knew that she would never be able to move on to someone else even if I did turn out like Aro; greedy and hungry for power.

"Bliss," I reminded, wiping a tear from her eye.

"Bliss," she agreed.

With that, we continued to fill the house with sweet music.

I followed her over the creek as she gracefully leapt over it. The sun cast an array of what appeared to be tiny diamond facets imbedded in her skin. We had a whole day to ourselves without having to worry about school. She caught my hand as I stopped next to her. We continued at a relaxed pace, not quite as slow as a human pace into the forest. Even though she tried to hide it, I knew Matia wanted to savor her last days on Earth. I planned to lead us to a spot that had a breathtaking view of the ocean and the mountains. It still had the beauty of La Push without the reeking werewolves. Matia was in no hurry to reach the cliffs – I noticed that she saw the world with new eyes now that she discovered she was going to die. She marveled at the height and strength of the trees, and the beauty of the delicate white flowers at their base. Then, when her thoughts would spontaneously focused on me, the gust of emotion and love swelled in her was unexplainable. Her thoughts flickered to me. These same feelings floated to the surface of her countenance. It was uncontrollable – I couldn't even stop and think about what I was doing. I swept her up into my arms, without even breaking our stride, and began to kiss her. I didn't care how much I would suffer from this when she was gone – all I cared about now was being with Matia as much as possible for as long as possible.

The sun was just beginning to set by the time we reached the cliffs. Her breath caught as she looked out to the shimmering sea, at the cliffs that plunged dramatically into it. The brilliant red sun was slowly sinking into the dark abyss of the Pacific - no matter how perfect a day was, it must always come to an end. I sighed, knowing only too well how much the sun would be missed, and how it would seem like the starless night would never dawn. Matia pulled us down to sit on the mossy ground facing west. I hugged her close to me and wrapped my arms around her warm self. She leaned her head against my shoulder.

"Did you know that you might be the warmest vampire to ever exist?" I asked her while I played with a strand of her red brown hair.

"Really?" she asked me, shocked.

"Yes, even now, I can feel your intense warmth,"

"Hmm interesting…" she mused. "Well you know, I was almost burnt to a crisp as a human," she laughed.

I didn't. Not only was it painful to think of her human life almost ended so brutally, but that she would face the same consequence now.

The understanding of my intense mood swing dawned on her.

"_I'm so sorry. It will be okay, I promise." _But I could see the strain she tried to hide.

"How will this ever be okay, Matia?" I asked her, I didn't even try to conceal my strain - she would see it anyway.

"Because even after the sunset of the most glorious day in the sun; dawn will come for you. Even after the darkest of nights; it will come. I promise."

"But I don't want a dawn… I want the sun to stay up forever. And if there was any way I could save the sun without the consequence being worse than death for her - I would."

"_I know. It wouldn't even make a difference. Aro would drive me out of your head, which would kill me anyways, and you would be forced to destroy the world; which is bad for everyone. And I can't stand by and let him take possession of you just so I can live." _She spat the last few words.

"I just wished we had more time," I whispered.

"Me too," I saw a tear welling up in her eyes. "Anything short of forever doesn't seem like enough time."

I cradled her tighter against me and kissed her head as the last sliver of sun disappeared into the sea.

When we got back to the house, we found it mostly deserted. _"Hmm wonder where everyone is," _thought Matia. "Don't know," I answered. Our hands were twined as we made our way up to my bedroom. She sat on the edge of the sofa playing with a stray thread on the pillow as I sorted through my many CD's. I settled on a Debussy classic and popped it into the CD player. Matia hummed quietly to the song while I twisted a piece of her hair in my fingers. This next song that played was one of my favorites. I pulled us off the couch and then pushed the couch against the wall. She looked at me, puzzled. I sank into a bow.

"May I have this dance?" I politely asked her.

"Of course you may," she responded. Her smile was filled with cheerful laughter. I cradled her hand in mine and laid my other hand gently on her waist. She rested her hand on my shoulder and we began to dance. "You know, this dancing was a big deal when we were actually seventeen," she joked.

"Oh yes," I laughed. "I remember the countless hours my mother made me practice."

She laughed her light silvery laugh and rested her head against my chest.

"_I love you, my dear Edward."_

"As I love you, my precious Matia. No matter what happens, you will always be the one who has touched my soul."


	16. Chapter 16

**Chapter 16: Preparing**

Everything seemed normal that next morning, Alice and Jasper were sitting side by side on the white couch. Except, something was terribly off. I then caught sight of Alice's expression. Distant horror.

_When shall we go, Caius?_

_I say the sooner the better! We don't want to keep our friends on their toes!_

_All right then it's settled. Marcus – pick a date that is coming up._

_September 13? Possibly. I like that day._

_Very well my brothers, we shall meet our friends on September the 13._

Blackness.

I felt Matia shudder violently next to me. I hated how she would have to feel pain just because I felt it. I didn't want to think of the date, but somehow the fact that today was September the 12 pushed its way into my head. A tortured moan echoed through the room. It took me a few seconds to realize that the moan was mine. Tomorrow. They would be here _tomorrow_ to take away my first true love.

"_Edward – I'm so sorry," _Alice thought desperately.

"_They're coming soon aren't they?" _ Matia thought to me with an effort to remain calm. All I could do was nod. She stared down at her feet, and then wrapped her arms around me. I held her tighter.

"It's ok," she murmured into my chest.

"When exactly?" she asked Alice.

"T-Tomorrow," Alice stuttered back. Matia stifled a gasp.

"Carlisle," Jasper called, not taking his eyes off of us. Obviously tasting the room.

Carlisle and Emmett bounded into the sitting room. One glance at my pain stricken face was all that was needed for Carlisle to understand what was happening.

"When?" he asked Alice.

"Tomorrow," she squeaked. Alice came to stand next to us – _"You aren't the only one that loves her, Edward. Please, just for a minute,"_ Alice tried. With a low groan, I removed my arms from around Matia. I was suddenly cold when she left. I met a pair of reluctant topaz eyes as she slowly unwound her arms. I rotated her to face Alice. Suddenly, tears began to well up in Matia's eyes as she took in Alice.

"My sister," Alice sighed as a single tear rolled down her cheek and onto Matia's back as they hugged; just like sisters.

Matia suddenly went on guard. _Be strong_ she thought over and over to herself.

She turned back to me.

"It's ok. It needed to happen anyway. This is what needs to happen." Despite the effort it took from her, every word rang with the clear bell of truth.

"I know," I sighed, and it killed me to agree with this.

"When Aro taunts you," she started, "you must stay strong – for both of us. We can't let him win. Promise me."

Matia was absolutely right. At the last minute, I would be filled with the desire to give in and be weak. I would surrender to Aro.

"I promise," I choked.

"Thank you," she gratified. Before anyone knew it, warm Matia was back in my arms.

I watched her red-copper hair fan out behind her as Matia pounced on a mountain lion. I quickly found another and carried it back to where she was killing hers. She finally stood up to face me, her eyes were liquid gold and her cheeks were slightly flushed. Her teeth glistened as she laughed at me. What could possibly be amusing now?

"You have a little…" she pulled a branch complete with leaves and buds out of my hair. She giggled again. Hmm… I wasn't usually this messy when I hunted. I guess I was too busy thinking about other things to worry about how neat I was. However, no matter what the circumstances were, I couldn't be in a bad mood for too long while Matia was in a good mood. I finally cracked a smile.

"You should really fill up, Jasper wants everyone to be as strong as possible for tomorrow," she playfully scolded. I sighed and drained the mountain lion I had taken a sip of just before.

"Come on I'll race you up that tree. See it?" she pointed to the tallest tree that was a good five miles away.

I laughed. "Sure."

"You have to really try this time! It's not a challenge if you don't try," she said seriously.

"You're on," I accepted.

"_One. Two. Three!"_ she counted down, then we were off. The trees whizzed past us as we navigated like sports cars through the thick forest. Matia was in the lead and she was already irritated – thinking I wasn't trying. I wanted her to be happy and feel the victory of winning, but she would know if I didn't try.

"_You are soo cocky! Come on! Race me!" _she yelled. I laughed and ran past her. A low hiss came from her as I took the lead. Matia gathered her speed up and launched herself into a tree next to the one we were racing to the top of. She navigated up the tree like a spider; occasionally jumping from one tree to another. I caught her in mid-jump, agilely swinging her onto my back. I climbed up the remainder of the tree with her on my back until I balanced surely on the topmost branch. There was mock irritation in her thoughts. I chuckled quietly. _"Cheater!"_ she thought in response. Her arms slightly tightened around my shoulders and around my chest. I suddenly felt her teeth on the side of my neck; contracting ever so slightly, just daring me to laugh again. I did – just to see what would happen. Her teeth tightened, and right when she was about to bite, she brought her lips forward and kissed that spot instead. I swung her into my arms. The spot where her lips touched my neck was still warm. Moonlight glinted off her pale skin, her making it glow luminously. Those hypnotic golden, wide eyes bored into mine. I leaned in and pressed my lips to hers. I began to pull away after a moment, but her fingers suddenly knotted in my hair, pulling my face back. The kiss became much more upbeat now. Her hands were busy in my hair, then moving slowly, tracing my neck and chest. A moan escaped her lips. Wherever her hand touched me, warmth spread throughout that spot. I pulled her even closer to me, soaking up as much of her aura as possible. Her thoughts could not be expressed in words – the love she felt toward me, and the love she saw for herself in me, dominated her mind.

A distant wolf howled, full of pain, at the full moon. A shiver ran down her spine; so violent, I could feel it. I was startled to fell warm wetness on her face.

_In a few hours time, this will be all over_ she couldn't help but thinking. She pulled away from the kiss, but kept our foreheads touching. I opened my eyes to see long shining streaks running down her face.

"Well I suppose it's just my luck. Right when life becomes meaningful…" she whispered. All I could do was stare at her – I was a statue displaying the emotion of hopelessness and sorrow. I suddenly had an idea.

"I'll follow you!" I cried, overjoyed. She looked at me, puzzled. "Once you are gone," I started, but this first part burned my throat to say, "I will find some way to end my life. We can be together in an afterlife," I concluded, fresh excitement in my eyes. Her reaction was not one that I was expecting. Rage, anger, disgust all shouted at me through her thoughts. Her eyes even looked murderous. Matia trapped my head in between her two warm hands. "Edward Cullen," she spoke in a clear voice. "You will not throw your life away when I am gone." She spoke each word forcefully. Matia released my face, but grabbed my wrist in an iron grip. She led me down to a lower level on in the tree – still high up, but the trunk was thicker. She pushed me so my back was against the trunk. Fury still colored her thoughts. Lightly as a cat, she hopped up onto a more elevated branch so that our faces were only inches apart. With both hands, she held my shoulders in place against the massive tree trunk.

"One of the reason for my death tomorrow is so that you can live your life freely," her eyes were fierce, but some of the fury and rage was gone. "Do not let my death be in vain," she ordered.

"How am I supposed to just go back to my life after _this_?" I gestured, somewhat awkwardly without moving my shoulders, toward her. Her lip trembled. She was torn in an internal conflict of leaving me broken when she left.

"Alice has seen that it will be hard for you at first. But she also saw that someone will come."

I sighed. "Alice isn't always right,"

"You'll never see me betting against Alice," Matia smiled. "I just hope she's good enough for you."

I laughed. No one would ever come that was like Matia.

She brought herself in closer to me and filled the space between us, meeting our lips.

"Am I done being lectured?" I asked, out of breath, as I momentarily pulled away.

"Oh that's right!" she laughed and let go of my shoulders. I caught her before she reached the branch I was on; and held her to me, with one hand supporting her, and the other across her back, hugging her, tight. Her legs wrapped around my waist. This time, no one broke away.

Slowly, the moon began to fade away, and the grayish pink glow of the rising sun began to fill the eastern horizon. As the sun came closer to rising, the sky turned a deeper and deeper color. A red dawn. We were sitting on the branch now, me sitting, and Matia cradled warmly in my arms, watching the sun come into the sky. Matia gently squeezed my hand.

"I love you," she sang.

"I love you," I smiled.

The trees streaked by us as I ran us through the lightening forest back home. As I ran, she said, "Edward, I want you to know, that this past year with you, has been incomparable to the best memories of my existence before we met. I never dreamed that I would be so lucky, but somehow I was. I would rather die today, after a year spent with you, than to live forever and have never met you at all." Her warm fingers stroked my face softly.

"Matia, I have watched all of my family find someone to love. I gave up all hope when I was the only one for such a long time. Then you came. You brought meaning, and passion, and love into my life. I-I can't imagine losing you now," I sincerely replied.

She pressed her lips softly to mine. "I'll stay as long as you need me to," she breathed.


	17. Chapter 17

**Chapter 17: Darkness**

"How long, Alice?" Matia asked when we got back to the house. Alice closed her eyes. As she sat looking into the future, her face began to get even paler.

"Daybreak." She responded. Matia nodded solemnly. I inhaled Matia's sweet smell to help clear my head of the dread that was creeping up on me. Not a smile, not a joke, not even a chuckle existed in the room. Without tearing from my grasp on her, Matia addressed the room.

"I just want to thank you all for your generous hospitality and for adopting me as part of your family. This past year truly was the best thing that had ever happened to me. I have never met a group of vampires as compassionate, as loving, as much as a family, like the Cullens. Thank you so much, and I'm so sorry about all the problems that I have placed on you. But, selfishly enough, I can't bring myself to wish I had never come." Matia thanked, emotion attached on every word. She turned toward me, and smoothed out the crease between my eyes. "Edward," she murmured and pressed her lips against the side of my neck. She showed me the best memories of her time with me. That first look into my soul, the first time she saw that I loved her, our first run, our first kiss, playing music together on the piano, watching the sunrise. I closed my eyes as we basked in the memories, the moments, the love.

Matia was passed throughout the family. Each member had something to say that was genuine. It was amazing how one person could touch so many lives. When she was passed back to me, I amplified my soul's emotions, just to show her how much she truly meant to me. I saw in her mind the beauty that she saw in my soul, which was masked by a black darkness. This disappointed her. She sighed, realizing this was unavoidable. As the sun broke through the horizon, Jasper stiffened. He swallowed once.

"Vampire." It was time.

We assembled in the center of the field. There was a strange sense of déjà vu to this, but there was one element that was extremely different. Matia and I stood hand in hand in the center of the loose gathering. A long strip of black began to form on the edge of the forest. I pulled her to me so that our sides were touching, but I was still slightly in front of her, it didn't matter what Aro saw now – he already knew everything. The black line came closer and closer. _"Stay strong,"_ she coached us both. This was it – the end was drawing nearer and nearer. I hissed as Aro came to stand about fifty meters away from us.

"It is wonderful to see you all again! Carlisle, Esme, Rosalie, Emmett, and Edward," Aro greeted. His eyes lingered on Matia's entwined hands in mine. I could swear I saw a grin spread across his face.

"Alice, Jasper and Matia! Why, this is the first time I am meeting you three," Aro warmly acknowledged.

"It is lovely seeing you again, Aro," Carlisle greeted, stumbling slightly on the word 'lovely'. I kept my eyes fixed on Aro, but examined the rest of his guard through Matia's eyes. Demetri, Felix, Jane, Alec, Marcus, Chelsea, and Caius made up the main party. There were others as well who would help out if they were needed.

"Matia, I must say, you are even more stunning in person," Aro complimented.

"_Too bad we're gonna have to kill ya!"_ Felix thought menacingly. I growled in his direction, as Matia tightened, sensing the evil in all the spirits.

"Thank you very much, Aro," Matia responded with composure.

"Now, Edward, I do hope that you have reconsidered our last offer," Aro asked pleasantly.

"No, Aro, my position hasn't changed," I said firmly.

"I don't think you understand, Edward. You would be in such high rank, you would have the world at your fingertips!" exclaimed Aro.

"I understand clearly. Thank you for the generous offer, but I am not interested," I said even more firmly. He was climbing toward the climax.

"Can one of you help me explain to Edward what a great opportunity he is giving up?" Aro asked us, looking at each of my family in turn. No one answered. His eyes finally fell on Matia.

"Matia," he started, evil deep in his eyes, "can you please persuade your Edward that he should join us?" Aro asked innocently. "He would be such an asset to our group."

"I don't think I can do that," she answered somewhat coldly.

"Ah, I thought you might say that," Aro said sadly, "maybe this will help you to persuade him…"

_Ah, I love Jane's little gift…_ Aro thought.

"NO!" I roared, as I roughly shoved Matia behind me. Jane looked at Aro and then shrugged. She was obviously meant to torture Matia. I felt pure hatred toward both her and Aro. She then smiled a wicked grin directly at me.

It felt like razors were stabbed at every inch of my body. It felt like a scorching fire was snaking through my veins. Despite what will power I had to stay standing, the pain was just too much, I fell to the ground. I heard the terror in Matia's scream as she dropped to her knees beside me.

"No, no," Demetri chided from the sidelines at my family who was prepared to spring.

"Tell him to join the Volturi," Aro laughed wickedly at sobbing Matia.

She leaned over me, trying to soothe my pain. "Edward, no, please, no, Edward," Wherever she touched me, there was momentary coolness. "Edward, please," she sobbed. Her tears fell on top of my face. "STOP IT!" she screeched at Jane.

"Tell him to join us," taunted Aro.

Matia was suddenly still. She closed her eyes, while grasping my hand. The pain was somehow starting to subside. Matia was concentrating on all the positive, strong parts from her soul, my soul, and the souls of my family. She focused on these, making them stronger. Now, the pain was just an annoying tapping on my skin. I opened my eyes to see an opal mist surrounding the eight of us.

"What are you doing?" I asked her, full of wonder.

"Can you feel any pain at all?" she asked, ignoring my question. No. All the razors, the fire, it was all gone.

"No," I answered. I stared at her tear-streaked face; she was making a protective barrier around us that consisted of our strong, pure souls. This showed that the purity and love deep within a soul could match anything.

"Will Aro call Jane off so he can ask about this?" she asked, eyes still closed.

I scanned Aro's thoughts. He seemed about to snap from the curiosity.

"Yes."

Matia exhaled and the opal mist disappeared. She opened her eyes to see Aro taking her in. Her eyes narrowed at the sight of him. I pulled us up and we instinctively wrapped our arms around each other.

"Unless you are interested in seeing that again, I would prefer if you didn't harm my family," Matia offered coldly.

"What was that?" Aro asked excitedly.

"A soul shield," Matia answered surely. "I have the ability to sense what is in a person's soul. I can choose to amplify the purest qualities from a group of souls and form these into a protective barrier. The pureness and goodness of our souls protected Edward against Jane," Matia answered quickly and sharply.

"What an amazing talent…" Aro mused. "What a waste…"

I growled at him.

"Now, now, Edward, you may either stay calm, or play tester to see how long Matia can keep her shield up." Aro laughed. Matia hissed. Jane suddenly smiled at Matia; a suddenly jolt went through Matia.

"No!" I screamed as I crouched to spring for Jane.

"Edward, its ok," Matia said calmly, the jolt still running through her. I looked back at Jane – her expression had rage on it – to Matia, who sat there, taking Jane's gift with half a smile on her face.

"Oh, maybe I forgot to mention this," Matia started. "I was almost killed by being burnt for witchcraft. So your little pain illusion doesn't do much – since the actual memory of the pain was much worse than what you are doing now, Jane." Matia smiled at her.

Jane screamed loudly.

"Relax, Jane. Matia is obviously gifted," Aro amended. I tried to prevent myself from staring at Matia, openmouthed. She was amazing. How much more could she do that I didn't even know about? I would never know. I hugged her tighter to me.

"Well I can see that none of you will persuade Edward," Aro concluded. "So we are going to make you an offer you won't be able to refuse," Aro smiled impishly. Hmm… I didn't know vampires had their own form of the Italian Mafia. In a few moments, he would give me the option that would kill Matia either way.

"Is this really necessary, Aro?" Carlisle asked hopelessly, shaking his head.

"I'm afraid so my dear friend. The temptation is just too strong." Aro turned toward Matia and I again.

"Perhaps, Edward, you would reconsider joining us if you knew that the one person you loved most was in danger?" Aro concluded, his eyes wild.

I took a deep breath and squeezed Matia's hand. _"Say no," _she ordered.

"No." I managed to choke out. Aro stared at us, shocked. Then he laughed.

"This is either one of two things. One: you don't understand that we will kill her if you don't join. Or, two: I thought you loved each other more than you actually did."

"Actually Aro, it's option number three," Matia rang out and silenced his laughter.

"If I joined your guard, you wouldn't let me love her. And I can't let Matia live in a world where her love isn't returned," I said as I trumped him. Aro stared at us, shocked by the truth of our words. Then he nodded.

"Yes, you're right," he shook his head. "So which will it be?"

Now came the hard part. The part that would kill me. _He won't be able to do it_ Aro thought excitedly.

"_Be strong" _my family beckoned me sadly. I met Matia's large golden eyes. I stared at her, pleading with my eyes. _"Do you love me?"_ she asked.

"You know I do," I promised quietly, never tearing away from her gaze.

"_Then say you won't join them."_ She squeezed my hand reassuringly. I looked up at Aro, then back at Matia. _"You can do it,"_ she encouraged. I looked up into Aro's waiting eyes. "I won't join you," I firmly said, though it burned me on the way out.

Matia stretched up on her toes to whisper in my ear.

"I love you – now please trust me when I say that it will be okay," she whispered and kissed me lightly on the cheek.

"You are willing to give up your love, Edward?" Aro asked astonished.

"Yes, Aro, he is. Did you not hear him the first time?" Matia quickly snapped. She saw that Aro kept repeating his question just so that it would hurt me even more.

"Oh, no I heard him. I just want to make sure he knows what he's doing."

"I know what I am doing, thank you, Aro," I stated.

"Very well. Felix – wait a moment," Aro said, stopping Felix in his tracks as he menacingly walked toward us. "Give them a few last moments,"

I had Matia in my arms before Aro was done speaking. I held her so that our faces were level. She had her arms around my neck, while mine were holding her tightly to me. Tears streamed down both our faces as we shared in our last kiss. _"I love you more than life, my Edward. Just because mine is over does not meat that you can't take care of yours." _She thought to me. "I love you," she repeated aloud.

"I love you, precious Matia. I can't let you go." I whispered. Her immediate thoughts flickered to _"Then don't,"_ but she recollected herself and changed them to, _"You must."_

"Felix. Demetri," Caius drowned. We held each other tighter – savoring our last moments.

"Edward, unless you want us to take her by force, I suggest you put the girl down," Demetri threatened. I wasn't listening. I was absorbing every ounce of her.

Matia reluctantly pulled away and loosed my arms from around her. Our thoughts both symbolized a breaking vase, or a torn ribbon. Our lives were crashing, we were being torn apart.

As a final act of affection, Matia laid her head over my chest and breathed in. I buried my face in her hair and, too, breathed in her sweet smell. For the last time.

"Too long!" Felix exclaimed as he and Demetri reached for Matia. I could feel them pulling on her – how she was gradually being taken away from me. We were four feet apart now – our hands still entwined. She stared into my eyes with sorrow, seeing my soul. She couldn't hold on for much longer; Demetri and Felix were both stronger than her.

I growled in fury when her warm touch was no more on my hand. I lunged for Felix, the stronger of the two. Before I could spring, I felt restraining arms around my chest. Emmett and Jasper were holding me back. I looked to Matia; she seemed to nod once at Jasper and Emmett. I struggled against their grip, but stopped when Felix and Demetri reached Aro. Aro grasped Matia tightly around her wrist, while Marcus grabbed her other wrist.

"You are sure this is what you want?" Aro asked me sadly.

I gaped at him, unable to answer. _"Say yes,"_ Matia hissed. How could I not honor this last thing she asked me to do?

"Y-Yes." I managed. A tear slid down my cheek; it burned my face wherever it touched.

"So be it," Aro concluded. "Felix. Demetri," he called again.

I stared into Matia's eyes. All sadness and despair was gone – replaced by bravery and passion.

"I love you," she said and thought quietly to me. I caught one last glimpse of her beautiful face before she was blocked from my view by a line of black.

I struggled furiously against Emmett and Jasper's restraining hands. Growls and snarls erupted from my chest.

"I'm so sorry," Jasper said.

The first metallic rip came. I cried out in pain. My family beside me winced. Another rip. I caught Aro's regretful gaze._ "I'm a man who has been tempted too far. Can you really blame me, Edward?"_

"Yes!" I roared back at him. Aro's apologetic smile filled my head. I struggled against my restrainers – trying to get a snap at Aro.

"Edward," Carlisle started as he stood next to me. "Remember who you are. Would Matia really want you to avenge her?" he asked me calmly.

I suddenly stopped struggling. No. She wouldn't want me to become a murderer for her sake. I had to do this for her.

Each time another metallic rip filled the air, I felt like I had been stabbed in the side. The rips finally ceased, and a spark caught my eye.

I fell to my knees, tears streaming down my face as a purple-gray smoke filled the air.

Blackness.


	18. Conclusion

**Conclusion**

I wasn't home for days after what happened. I foolishly thought that Matia's presence would be stronger in sentimental places that we went. I ran to the spot in the forest where we shared our first kiss. The marks that her feet made on the mossy rock that she stood on were still imprinted. The place screamed old memories at me that would never happen again. A cold chill would shiver down my spine whenever I realized that I would never see her again.

I found her ledge. The place where we found out that our love was unconditional. Again, the memories screamed themselves at me. I couldn't handle it.

I sat at the top of the tree where we watched the sun rise just before _it_ happened. Her scent still lingered on the branches. I greedily breathed it in. These memories were too new; I had to go home. I promised her that I would try to live my life - going to different places that she has been doesn't sound like I was fulfilling my promise.

When I walked into the living room, Alice already had her arms around me.

"I'm so very sorry, Edward," she sincerely said. I just nodded and shook her off. Pity was the last thing I needed now. I would go up to my room and listen to some music – drown everything and everyone out. Once I reached my door, I groaned. Her scent was so concentrated in here.

"I'll just have to endure it," I sighed and walked in. As I walked to the wall of CD's, something caught my eye. A black rose that sat on top of a letter was sitting on my desk. "Alice," I murmured. She just saw me, why is she being so formal with a letter? Nonetheless, I picked up the sheet of paper anyway. A shiver ran down my spine. This handwriting wasn't Alice's, but it looked too familiar.

_My Dearest Edward,_

_I love you so much, and I cannot even begin to explain what this past year has meant to me. I never in my dizziest daydreams dreamed that I would ever find someone quite so perfect as you. I pray that over time, you will find it in your heart to forgive me for leaving you broken._

_She will come, Edward. I know you can't see it now, but I know deep within my spirit that someone will come. You will love her with all your heart – you will have moved on. Which is precisely what I want you to do. Don't dwell on the past – look on it as happy memories, and hope for the future._

_I hope that this letter will not make it harder for you to move on, but I needed to say this to you. I will be with you as long as you need me to be. I won't be here in the flesh, but I am not going to leave you. When the time is right, I will leave, because you will be okay. But until then, I will always be with you._

_I am begging you to not lose hope in love just because the chapter in your life with me has passed. I wish we had forever, but we didn't. You must accept that and move on with your life. Stay true to your family and friends. They need you. I need you to live._

_This final chapter in my life was the best I could ever ask for. I do not wish that I would have just kept to Canada, and as a result still be living now. I would gladly give my life for being with you than to keep it and never being with you at all. You taught me what it meant to love, and to love life._

_Thank you so very much for that, love._

_Please remember that the night is always the darkest just before the dawn._

_Love, now and Forever,_

_Matia_

A single tear fell on her words. I quickly wiped my face so that her parting letter would not be soiled. How would she possibly stay with me? What did she mean when she said she wouldn't leave? My eyes swept my desk; looking for some kind of clue that could explain. The black rose. I had forgotten all about it; so I examined it more carefully. The petals were pitch black and the stem was a deep evergreen. The briars were also black, but with red tips – as if they were dipped in blood. I was almost positive that there was no such thing as a black rose – but here was one. I ran down the stairs like lightning. "Carlisle," I called.

He looked up at me, surprised. _He is choosing to be social?_ He thought. I wonder how terrible I must have been to be around these past few days.

"In all your years, have you ever seen a black rose?" I asked him.

"Never. They don't exist," he answered, still puzzled.

I silently held up the rose. He gasped.

"I found it along with a note from…" I couldn't say her name, but they all knew to whom I was referring.

"How did she acquire a black rose?" asked Esme. Alice smiled.

"Black roses symbolize goodbyes and the beginnings of hard times," she said.

"Matia is giving you a black rose because they mean goodbye," Alice clarified.

Days and weeks passed by slowly. I cared for the single black rose that Alice claimed was from Matia. I needed her presence. I needed here. I walked over to check on the rose; then took two steps back. A shiver went down my spine. Another black rose stood, upright in the vase next to the first. Next to the vase was a folded piece of paper with the word, "_Edward__" _on the front. With trembling hands, I unfolded the paper.

_My Love,_

_You are not listening to me. Please try and make an effort to live. The days go by and you just endure them. I understand that it is difficult – but you must try. Yes, the black roses are from me. I told you I wouldn't leave you until you could manage on your own, didn't I? I will never be far away. All you have to do is look deep within your soul and you will find me._

_I love you._

_Matia_

**Epilogue**

Of course, Edward has a hard time getting over Matia, but he eventually does. She continues to send him roses and letters that remind him of his promise and that everything will be okay. As Edward starts to move on, the roses become lighter and lighter until they eventually turn white. The white symbolizes hope. By this time, Edward is learning to live even though he has experienced loss. About ten years before Edward meets Bella, the flowers and letters stop coming. Edward does not need Matia to guide him anymore. Over the years, Edward has gradually and unknowingly locked up all memories of Matia. She helped him do this so that he doesn't have to dwell on her anymore. Even though he cannot access the memories and feelings, (like they are locked behind a door) the lessons he has learned still influence him, even though he doesn't know it.

The reason he is so incredibly protective of Bella is because he doesn't want to lose her, like he lost Matia. Edward does not know that this is why he is protective. The reason why Edward is so hesitant with Bella is also because of Matia. Unknowingly, he is afraid that he will lose Bella, and doesn't want to hurt himself further by deepening the relationship. Once they are married, he realizes that Bella will be safe forever. Also, Edward tells Bella that no one else has ever touched his heart. This is true. Matia touched his soul.

Edward and the Cullens spend the years without another thought of Matia. (Again, the memories are trapped behind a locked door in their minds) Even though he doesn't think of her, the things he has learned still stay. If Edward never met Matia, he would not have known how to love someone. This newly developed skill allows him to love Bella fully. Having loved and lost, Edward now loves Bella even more than he loved Matia. And that is saying something. Matia's purpose was to teach Edward how to love. Even though she has deceased, what she taught Edward remains with him forever.

**The End**


End file.
